Worst shampoo I have ever bought

Beauty, Reviews

Nobody is immune to the handy work of the corporate marketing gurus.

After all, they are the pros. Having repeatedly sworn to myself that I will not fall for their sweet words again, I still find myself buying stuff I don’t need, stuff that just sucks or stuff that’s on offer. Grrrrr!!!

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One of those things was my Volume shampoo and conditioner for Fine hair by Phyto Paris.

Here is how the story goes.

Before I begin, I have to warn you that this post contains an image of a very angry-looking cat.

WARNING: If you are sensitive to angry cat images look away now!

Having left the hairdresser with an uplifted mood I decided to treat my hair with a little something it will like. After all it has done for me, it deserved some spoiling. 

So I went to a beauty store nearby and after hearing some recommendations from the consultant I purchased a Phyto shampoo and conditioner set.

Next morning was when that mood became rather shitty. (And not because the shampoo was brown in color, that would just be silly, and it did become sorta see-through as I spread it). It was because of this: after putting a tonne of shampoo on my hair I still had almost NO FOAM at all!

The shampoo didnt foam!! Whaaat! What were they thinking? Who tested this product?! 

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Was it a test group of cats? Like oh great, there is no foam, no mess. And actually we don’t really water either. It’s a done deal. We will go with that. 

To prove this theory I went and tested it on my three cats. They have never been great fans of showers and never really shown any signs of overwhelming joy caused by the foam, so it was a high chance they would approve this shampoo. 

The results were what they call inconclusive, meaning one of the cats didn’t like it, whilst the other two behaved as usual.

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Clearly not a fan…

But let’s go back to the effect of Phyto on human hair. After I finished helplessly trying to foam up my hair and rinsed this shampoo out, my hair felt like the rough side of a kitchen sponge: rough, dirty and stuck together with superglue.

Not exactly the effect I was hoping for.

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Still clinging on to the shreds of optimism I got on with it. I don’t usually follow instructions and prefer to put more conditioner than recommended since my hair is quite dry. But since this was the first time using this brand, I squeezed a recommended coin size amount of Phyto conditioner and gently spread it all over avoiding the scalp. That seemed to make things much better.

After blow drying my hair looked very sleek, flat and feeling slightly oily. In three words: second day hair. 

If I were to do a promise vs result comparison table it would look like this:

What the label promised

The Actual Result

Volume  Flat as a surface of a frozen lake (and not in a romantic way, in a cold mean slippery kind of way)
 Perfect for fine hair       Made it heavy and slightly oily.
 $80 worth of value $0 value (and I am being generous here)
 Luxury brand made in Paris  Overpriced brand that invested everything into marketing and nothing into the product.

So here is my final rating of Phyto Volume shampoo and conditioner for fine hair.

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Shampoo – 0 out of 10: doesnt wash, doesnt foam. I could give it a star for the smell but come on.

Conditioner – 3 out of 10: made my hair soft at the expense of making it heavy and oily. 

And finally, with my readers as my witnesses I swear to never buy products that are constantly on offer, or products that I can’t explain why I need. Amen.

P.S. I will probably still buy too much, but hell I am good at explaining why I “need” it)))

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2 thoughts on “Worst shampoo I have ever bought

  1. I was just thinking that the way you sign your name would be really adorable if you put little cat ears and tails on the last three letters.. like you are the first letter and the last three are your kitties. Hehe!

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